THE EDITOR, Madam:
WITH THE festive season fast approaching, I thought it appropriate to share this recipe for cooking your own goose with my fellow Jamaicans. Never mind that this is the same goose that lays the golden egg, we are going to cook it anyway.
INGREDIENTS:
the goose that lays the golden egg. (Our only natural resource and habitat, Jamaica).
Corruption
Greed
Ignorance
Fear
Bullets from illegal guns
Frustration
Enlightened self-interest
Myopic advisors/policy makers
Indiscipline
Selfishness
METHOD
STEP ONE: - Kill the goose that lays the golden egg. This may be achieved by several means:
Destroy the natural resources by polluting the beaches and killing the corals that produce our world famous white sands and protect our precious shores from erosion.
Cut down thousands of trees in order to construct sprawling housing communities and thus bring about sparse rainfall.
Pollute the air with exhaust fumes from the ubiquitous motor car.
Frighten away the tourists with the spectre of crime.
Frustrate our young minds into emigrating by offering no real hope for a comfortable future and no real way of making a difference in a thoroughly corrupt system.
STEP TWO: - Pluck the goose. Hand control of the goose over to rapacious businessmen and corrupt individuals in positions of power who will do a good job of picking the goose clean.
STEP THREE: - Pepper the goose thoroughly with the bullets from illegal guns. Add corruption, greed, ignorance and fear.
STEP FOUR: - Salt the goose by allowing it to sit in the briny tears of the families and friends who have lost loved ones to violent crime.
STEP FIVE: - Stir thoroughly with the iron rod of entrenched protectionism.
STEP SIX: - Bring to a boil with flames of violence.
STEP SEVEN: - Add frustration, enlightened self-interest, myopic advisors/policy makers, indiscipline and selfishness.
STEP EIGHT: - Allow to simmer in the bottomless pot of apathy and inertia.
Voila! There you have it; your goose is cooked.
On second thought, perhaps you should become a vegetarian like me and reprieve the poor goose instead. Nourish her with respect for and kindness toward all. Shelter her from the insatiable greed of some of our businessmen and people in positions of power. Protect her from ruthless criminals. Entertain her with the laughter of happy/healthy children. Bathe her in hope and pride. Prune her with honesty and fair play. It is healthier for us all.
I am etc.,
GARTH A. RATTRAY
E-mail: akhnaton@cwjamaica.com
10 Coliston Drive
Kingston 10
Via Go-Jamaica
