Dear Pastor,
I am 19 years old and my fiance' is 27 years old. We have been living together for three years. I love him very much. We have decided to get married very soon and start a family.
My fiance' has fathered a son who is five years old. We want to have one together. I cannot give him a child, so we are asking for a baby to be a part of our family.
I am a hairdresser and my fiance' is working. I am appealing to any young woman who has a baby and is unable to care for the child financially and emotionally. We would be happy to have that child. It would be a blessing to have that child in our family.
I.B., St. Ann.
Dear I.B.,
You are only 19 years old. I do not see why you are so eager to get pregnant or to adopt. What you need to do is go back to school. However, if you are determined to become a mother, you may speak to the Adoption Board. The numbers are listed.
Pastor.
Seeks comforting prayers after family fight
Dear Pastor,
I am having a problem and it is bothering me. I am in my 20s and I have children.
I was living with relatives. One of my aunts accused me of cursing my grandmother. She told another aunt about it and instead of her trying to find out whether or not it was true, she started to curse me. Then she hit me and I hit her back and we started to fight.
When my grandmother heard us fighting, she asked what was wrong and I told her. She said she and I did not have any argument.
My children and I went to bed. The bed that we used to sleep on belongs to one of my aunts, but the mattress belongs to me.
When it was morning, one of her daughters walked on the bed. I spoke to her about it, and her mother started to war with me again. She took away her bed so I had to lean up my mattress.
I had to send my daughter to stay with a Christian lady and my son went to his father who is living with his relatives. I cannot go and stay with him because there is no space.
I am staying with a girlfriend, but when her boyfriend comes home I always have to go somewhere else.
My boyfriend wants me to go back to church. The relatives of my son's father treat him badly. Everyday people tell me to take my son away from them. I am asking you to pray for us.
My son's father wants to get married, but I need to get a job first before I think about getting married.
M.S., St. Ann
Dear M.S.,
Your aunt was wrong. She should not hit you. You are a grown woman and that is not the way relatives should settle dispute. I am sorry that you got into a fight with her. Why in the world should relatives fight and beat up each other? That is so shameful. Relatives need each other. They should support and defend each other, not get into physical fights.
I hope that you would get a job soon. Too bad your aunt retaliated by taking away her bed. That is childish behaviour. If you put your trust in God, He will give you more than a bed.
Your son's father wants you to go to church. He too should go to church. The brothers and sisters of the church may help you if they see that you are serious about serving God.
If you know for sure that your son is being abused, you should talk to his father about it. Be careful how you take news. Some people make a lot of trouble. They don't always speak the truth, so you have to be careful how quick you believe what people say to you.
Pastor.
38-y-o man wonders about difficulty of first time sex
Dear Pastor,
I am a 38-year-old man, and I have never had sex. At present I do not have a girlfriend. It takes great courage for me to talk to women and to tell them that I do not have a girlfriend.
I want to know if it would be very difficult for me to have sex for the first time when the time comes. I will be looking out for your answer.
C., Birmingham, England
Dear C.,
You don't need to be ashamed because you have never had sex. Some folks may say it is highly unusual for a 38-year-old man not to have had sex at that age. However, if you are a dedicated Christian that is quite possible.
Whenever you have established a relationship with a woman and you are about to get married, you should consult your family doctor. If you are not circumcised, you may even want to discuss that with him or her.
If you are in good health everything should be alright, my friend. Sex is an art. You will learn how to make love with a woman. Don't worry about it. Pastor.
Do you know Roy Coburn's relatives?
Dear Pastor,
I have been putting off writing this letter for years and now I need to do it.
My name is Michelle Coburn. I was born 32 years ago at the Kingston Public Hospital. I am trying to find my father's relatives. His name is Roy Coburn and he worked at the wharf.
He was killed more than years ago in Jamaica when I was only 12 years old. I am trying to find my aunts. I last saw them more than 14 years ago.
When I visited Jamaica in 1994 and went to Spanish Town, they had removed and no one knew where they were.
I am asking if anyone who may know this whereabouts to contact you. This would make me really complete. It would be really great if I could find them.
Michelle Coburn, Queens, New York.
Dear Michelle,
We trust that someone would contact us. If we hear from anyone we will contact you. Blessings on you for the New Year.
Pastor
