Hartley Neita, ContributorKiller Mc went to elementary school with me when we were children. From the age of 13 he boasted. Not about scholastic achievements, as he was a dunce. Nor could he boast of any talent in sports. He was clumsy at cricket, and was worse at "grubbing", a sort of football game we played with an old tennis ball. His main boast was about the girls he had conquered.
None of them went to school with us. He had no time for children, he said; they were flat-chested. The girls he spoke about were late teenagers, long out of school, and living, as he did, in a district some distance from the school. And he described and shaped their form with his hands so vividly that we were satisfied his adventures were real. And we envied him. For we were feeling the urges of puberty, but were too shy, and definitely too afraid, to try to do anything about it.
His surname was McKenzie and so he became known as Killer Mc. And he was proud about the name and very cocky. Every morning before school he regaled us with his exploits of the previous evening. According to him, there were six impatient young women who waited eagerly for him to meet them at various hideouts near their home. He enjoyed the attention of three of them, before running to his home through the woods to avoid the others. And we believed him. After all, he was Killer Mc.
He never, of course, mentioned their names. He was a young man of class, and gentlemen never, ever, named the ladies of their trysts. A year or two later, Killer Mc left our village with his family. On Saturdays, we who remained went to Killer Mc's former district, hoping to see and meet the ladies he had left behind. We spent the day with our sling shots shooting at birds. We stayed until dusk but never saw any girls seemingly moaning their loss.
Maybe, we wondered, they had found another Killer Mc. Years later I met the Killer again. We went to a bar and he ordered drinks for both of us. We talked about our youth. He reminded me about his girls and I told him how we went to his district to see if we could find them. He chuckled, confidently. "They all left and came to Kingston," he said. "One by one they tracked me down hoping, I suppose they could trap me into marriage. But you know me man, I'm not a one woman man."
We finished the drink and left. I noticed he staggered as he walked through the door. We parted outside, promising to keep in touch. That night I went to a house party. I was sitting in the dark outside on the lawn with a group of friends when I heard a familiar voice behind me. "I can't take another drink tonight," the man said. "I was with a long ago friend from my old school, and man, we drank a quart of Appleton between us. And it was only because I had to I spend the rest of the day with one of my girls why I didn't bounce another quart with him." He paused. "I also have another girl to look for later," he added. I didn't have to turn around to see that it was my old friend Killer Mc. Still boasting!
