By Claude Mills, Staff Reporter
- Norman Grindley /Staff Photographer
JANICE IS a good-looking 29-year-old physicist with a great sense of humour and killer legs. However, she is still single. In fact, it has been three months since she last had a date, and 'aeons' since she had a steady male friend.
According to Janice, it smarts being smart because men are intimidated by her.
"It's not like I go around debating Einstein's theory of relativity on dates or anything. I am attractive enough, I think, but guys I like just seem intimidated by me, especially after I tell them what I do for a living. Maybe they are just insecure," she said.
Janice is not alone. There are thousands of women out there who feel that men perceive the trait of intelligence in women as a flaw and a definite turn-off.
"Intelligence in a woman is nice, but it doesn't work for me. When a woman walks pass a man on the street, the average man doesn't turn and say, check out the nice set of brain waves on that babe... it just doesn't happen," one man said.
Another man pointed to what he called 'the confrontational attitude' of so-called intelligent women which handicaps relationships.
"Seriously, I've dated smart women, and I have found that there is a tendency not an absolute rule for very bright women to abandon relationships much more quickly than other women, and they are less interested in negotiating and compromising. And what's worse, dem feisty with it, is like they feel they always have something to prove."
Dr. Leahcim Semaj agrees.
"More women find intelligent men attractive than men who find intelligent women attractive. This is a worldwide phenomenon but it is more pronounced in Jamaica, especially with younger women moving significantly ahead of men in recent times," he said.
For every four University of West Indies graduates, three are female; and more women than men have graduated from the University of Technology since 1988.
"Men are intimidated by women who are smarter and earn more money than they do. Women are socialised to find men who are smarter, richer and taller than she is, but it is hard for the Jamaican women to find a man who is smarter than her... and that makes for a sometimes-unhappy situation," Dr. Semaj said.
Dr. Semaj related a story where he said that a woman at a press conference in Trinidad once told him that she asked her company to prepare two salary cheques for her each month, 'one that was less than what her husband made to appease his insecurities, and another which went straight to the bank'.
"In the last twenty years, Jamaican women have been forced to submerge their intellect for the sake of relationships, but there are others who rub it in the face of their men by reminding him that she earns more than he does. A lot of Jamaican men are concerned about their intellect or lack thereof," Dr. Semaj said.
A TURN ON
But intelligence is STILL one of the greatest turn-ons. Most women surveyed for this article also seemed to associate intelligence with the ability to have a good conversation. "Boys make the mistake of thinking we always mean book smart when we say that, but all kinds of smart are welcome. A guy is only worth his salt if he has something intelligent to say, an argument should not be made unless backed up by something. I had in the past a tendency to date complete morons. All I want to know is that my man does think," Carmen Goodison, a 25-year-old legal secretary, said.
In the meantime, intelligent Jamaican men have the pick of women of varying levels of intelligence, and social upbringing.
According to Dr. Semaj, men have been enjoying a bumper season in terms of mating choices over the last two decades because intelligence is a scarce male commodity in the dating market.
"I heard a prominent male intellectual muse that the best relationship is between a man with a post-graduate degree and a woman with a high school degree. Bright women sometimes end up alone because smart men have more options."
"Intelligent men can have smart women as well as women who aren't that intelligent but have other qualities like for instance, the 'wickedest slam'. But what men really want is satisfying relationships, they don't want a woman who is always competing with them, they tire of that after a while, they just want to know that dinner is ready when they get home," Dr. Semaj said.
Intelligence isn't the only pre-requisite for a relationship. Women polled for responses listed other turn-ons such as charm, good looks and a sense of humour. The only consensus? You can't build a relationship on one turn-on.
The ladies want a package deal, however quirky the contents.
