FOR MANY young women who become teen parents, the promise of a bright future appears beyond reach but there are some teen mothers who are trying hard to make up for their past mistakes by making use of their second chance to achieve their goals.
Fifteen-year-old Dihema Bar-nard, was a student at a prominent high school in Kingston and was months away from sitting her Caribbean Examination Council (CXC) examinations. She was always getting good grades and had big plans to become a lawyer. But her dreams took a downward turn in July 2000, when she found out she was pregnant.
Although Dihema was offered the opportunity to continue classes she had to drop out of school because her 132.5 centimetres body was too fragile to take on the weight of childbearing.
Now, she is faced with the mammoth task of being a mother to a daughter who will be one year old in July.
Dihema who is now 17 years old says she wanted to die when the pregnancy test showed positive.
"Things were bad at home both emotionally and physically in every way, and then finding out that I was pregnant made it even worse because I didn't know how or what to say or even who to say it to. It was really horrible" she said in a recent interview with the JIS.
"I wanted to be a lawyer from I was a little girl and I was like no, my life cannot stop here, what do I have to offer my child? So one day I just got up and decided to just go look for schools and I eventually called the Women's Centre and got myself in," she says.
Dihema is now looking forward to sitting four CXC subjects this month, with her plans to become a lawyer still in the pipeline.
"My life was changed the day I took the decision to have sex while in school, but it's not one that I look back on and regret. Although I lost some things, I gained a lot as well. Having my daughter has inspired me and she is actually motivating me to go on. I must be successful in life because of her. Don't get me wrong though, I'm not telling anyone to go out and get pregnant, but I am saying that if you find yourself in that situation remember, there are always options and only you can know which is right for you. Sometimes you have mishaps in life that you just have to overcome and my pregnancy was just one of them," she says.
Dihema is now engaged to her daughter's father with whom she lives. When asked what words of advice she has for her daughter she says: "Sometimes I wished she was a boy, because it would be much easier to explain the facts of life. When I look back, my mother did not tell me anything that had to do with sex. She did not enlighten me on what could happen, so sometimes you have to go out and experience things. So I'll definitely explain to her all these things so she doesn't make the same mistake that I made because it's very hard; it's not easy at all," she states.
Fifteen-year-old D'andro Clarke is seven months pregnant and was in a similar position as Dihema - getting ready to sit her CXCs.
"I was talking to this guy and I believed in him. I thought I was enjoying life and so he asked me to have sex with him. I decided to do it, but I did not protect myself so I got pregnant," she relates to JIS News.
"At first I was worried because I was in Grade 11 getting ready to do my CXCs and I really wanted to do them. I even wanted to abort the baby to get the chance to continue school, but my mother found out about the Women's Centre and took me there," she says.
D'andro who is from St. Ann, has been boarding at the Centre since January and will be sitting three CXC subjects in June - English Language, Literature and Mathematics. "I'm only doing those three because the others require School Based Assessment (SBA) tests and I won't be able to manage them," she explains.
The father of D'andro's baby is much older and a case is now in court against him with a charge of carnal abuse. "I'm sure he would want to support both the baby and I, but we cannot correspond with each other because of the Judge's order," she notes.
If D'andro should end up with a girl, she wants her to be on the right track. "I'll have to tell her that life isn't running away and that she should try and wait on the right time, even if it's hard to do. I'll encourage her to tell me everything so we can talk it out and try to get her over it," she states.
Mary Jane Brown (not her real name) had her baby when she was 15 years old. Unlike the other girls Mary had used a condom for protection but her partner did not put it on properly.
"The condom was put on backways. Both of us did not see it as a problem, it broke and so I got pregnant," she recounts.
Mary Jane, who also attends the Women's Centre, says her daughter is now three and a half months, and that she gets financial support from her family.
However, despite the financial support, Mary says things are not 'honky dory' around the house."
"I am a bit depressed... I'm considering other options like moving out, because I can't stay there. I do not have a good relationship with my mom and my stepdad and money isn't all," she says with tears rolling down her cheeks.
She says the baby's father was still in school (sixth form) when the pregnancy happened and refused to take responsibility for the child. This put additional pressure on Mary Jane.
Mary Jane, as well as the other girls are currently getting counselling from the Centre.
Esther Rainford-Clarke, Centre manager at the Women's Centre in Kingston tells JIS News that counselling is a part of the course taught at the institution.
"When they are pregnant we counsel them and help them to get back on the right track. All our counsellors are trained midwives or teachers," she points out.
She notes that one of the Centre's objectives is family planning and "whenever they come here family planning and counselling is a must and to place them back in school they must be on a method (contraceptive)."
The Centre also follow-up on cases. There is a placement officer who places them in schools. Each school is asked to fill out a form to report on each student.
The subjects offered at the Centre are Principles of Business, Office Procedures, Accounts, Mathematics and English.
"We don't do the sciences and we are in the process of looking for a teacher for our new computer laboratory. Quite a few girls come here who have reached the Information Technology level for CXC, so we are trying to assist them to do their exams. This is a new ball game for us," Mrs. Rainford-Clarke adds.
The computer lab has seven computers, but the Centre is hoping to increase that number to 10.
The main function of the Women's Centre is the operation of its Programme for Adolescent Mothers. This programme deals with the problems associated with teenage pregnancy such as interrupted education and low employment potential.
