THERE IS an infinite variety of kisses - from playful or tender lip kissing to deeply arousing open-mouthed kissing with tongue play.
Kissing someone you are mad about is one of life's great pleasures - or it should be. However, surprisingly many people have no idea how to kiss. A poor kisser can be a major disappointment while someone skilled at the art can have you tearing your clothes off.
The decision to kiss for the first time is a crucial chapter in any love story. It changes the relationship more significantly than even the final surrender because the kiss already has within it that surrender.
DOs AND DON'Ts FOR THE PERFECT KISS
Do make sure to take care of your personal hygiene. Fresh breath and clean teeth are a must. Bad breath is a definite turn off. Keep a pack of Wrigley's, Winter Fresh chewing gum or mints on hand.
Smokers please take note - kissing you is like licking an ashtray.
Don't deep throat your partner. Most people hate to have a wriggling tongue worming down their throat as though there is a search on for buried treasure. Most of the time you'll only use the tip to the middle of your tongue and it will extend to about the middle of your partner's mouth. This way no one is strained or gagged and it's enjoyable for both of you. Move your tongue up and down, side to side, clockwise, counter-clockwise, wherever it feels best. Movement is the key though.
Don't be guilty of a limp tongue.
Do remember and practice the three Ps of kissing - passion, patience and pace. Less is more. Two things can happen if you use your tongue too much - it either gets tired or your partner gets tired of your tongue. So, if you're in a heavy make-out session, French kiss on and off for a minute or so, stop for a couple minutes then bring your tongue back. Take it from the girls and me, this is a BIG turn on.
Keep things slow and sensual, at least at the beginning of each kissing session. Keeping your eyes closed also adds to your concentration - although some people prefer to keep their eyes open.
Do use your hands. This is key to achieving the perfect kiss. Women generally agree that having their guy run his hands through their hair or up and down their arms and body is sexy. It sure heats up a kiss and can take things to another level.
Do remove glasses and be careful with braces. Glasses can get foggy. If you wear braces do not press too hard against your partner's lips, you might dig at the inside of the lips.
Don't imitate a vacuum cleaner. Sucking too hard can actually hurt the other person's tongue.
Don't slobber your partner. Sharing a kiss is one thing, but sharing saliva is another. Keep your faucet in check, free-flowing saliva is gross.
4 WAYS TO PERFECT YOUR LIP LOCK
1. When your lips meet, keep them slightly parted and press gently against his/her lips. Tilt your head slightly to one side so your noses won't get in the way.
2. What to do next? It depends. If it's just a little kiss, a peck on the lips, move away but (this is very important) don't make a sudden move as if you were disgusted by the kiss.
3. Once you get started, he'll either put his tongue into your mouth, or you slip yours into his. Don't let your tongue go limp, move it around, or playfully push your tongues in and out of each other's mouth.
4. Gently explore your partner's mouth with your tongue.
By the way, although you might be nervous giggling during or after is not cool. The guy won't understand that it's just nervous laughter. He'll likely think that you are laughing at him.
- Reprinted from Flair, June 2001
