Treated as I wanted to
No one will dictate
my destiny.I am positive
Knowing exactly what I want
A future for my kids
A way for tomorrow
No one can change that
Cause that's my life!
A body form
A spirit within
Coming back from slavery
From places I have been.
In my vision I trod the earth
Seeking the true meaning
Of life
If nurtured constructively
I know, when this body
form passes
This spirit within will take
Another body form,
Correcting the mistakes
Of this one named Louise
Moving into
That called Magdalene
THIS POEM, 'Life' written by Louise Fraser-Bennett, eloquently expresses the very essence of a truly remarkable woman: the in-your-face, staring-in-the-sun brazenness of a fearless spirit. Here in this poem we get a vision of the philosophy of life and death of one very determined woman.
Louise tells us about the uphill climb that was her life: not an easy road. We see the focused onward and upward movement; the sense of purpose to achieve goals; the refusal to let others dictate her destiny; the positive vibrations; the knowledge that the children are our future and must be nurtured. We also see the religious side of Louise in this poem.
First, the West African consciousness that the body is the soul case: the spirit is housed in matter. Man and woman are more than flesh. As Louise puts it, poetically, 'a body form/ a spirit within'.
ANCESTRAL MEMORIES
In Jamaica, we have ancestral memories of this instinctive knowledge that the body houses the soul and nurtures it. But we usually acknowledge this African worldview, somewhat negatively, in the popular expression, 'mi naa wok out mi soul case'. Memories of the exploitation of the black body in slavery demand that now, in freedom, we look after our body, our soul case. Our lives both body and spirit do matter, whatever our level of material poverty. That's why 'church' in its variety of forms is so important in Jamaica. We are, essentially, an African people with a deep-seated regard for the spiritual roots of material existence.
Louise hints at another aspect of African philosophy in this poem, 'Life' the belief in reincarnation. You know how we say of some children with ancient, knowing eyes 'that one come back. Dat pikni was here before'. Louise intimates this knowledge when she extends the thought a body form/ a spirit within/ Coming back from slavery/ From places I have been. Those intriguing lines are open to different interpretations. Louise could simply mean that from the days of slavery we, as a people, understood the importance of nurturing our body form and the spirit within. But, at a deeper level, Louise could be declaring that she, herself, is a body form that has come back from slavery times, carrying within her the spirit of rebellion; the refusal to be what anyone else wants her to be.
The places she has been are not just the physical places of this life but all those other worlds her spirit has inhabited in the past and which she will explore in the future. In support of this second interpretation are Louise's naturally mystic words that should comfort us as we contemplate her passing: I know, when this body form passes/ This spirit within will take/ Another body form.
It is at this point in the poem that Louise introduces the explicitly Christian elements in her religious consciousness. The mistakes of the 'body form' Louise will be erased and she will assume a new soul case that of Mary Magdalene. I think it's very significant that Louise picks that particular soul case to shock out in.
I think Louise chose Mary Magdalene as a symbol of her own reformed self. And you have to understand why Mary Magdalene had become one of Jesus' disciples. By the way, we usually remember only the 12 men who are recorded as the 'official' disciples of Jesus. Is pure gender politics. Because nuff women were disciples of Jesus but we hardly hear about them.
MARY MAGDALENE'S STORY
Anyhow, here is Mary Magdalene's story. And because I don't really like the foreign English of the King James Version of the Bible, nobody don't talk like that no more, not even in England, mi going give you Mary Magdalene story inna fi wi language.
One a di Pharisee dem ask Jesus if im woulda come an eat a food wid im. An im go a di Pharisee yard an dem sidown an start fi eat. Listen mi no! One woman inna di city, weh everybody know bout, seh she a sketel, when she hear seh Jesus inna di Pharisee house a eat, she bring one alaglaster box a ointment an she stand up side a Jesus foot, back a im, an start one piece a bawling. An so she bawl a so she a wash im foot wid her eyewater. An she tek her hair wipe im foot dem, an she kiss im foot, an oil dem up wid di ointment. When di Pharisee im see weh she a do, hear weh im a seh to imself: If dis man a prophet fi true im woulda know a wa kind a woman a fingle-fingle im up. She a no good woman.
An Jesus answer im same time an seh, Simon, mi want tell yu something. An im seh, gwaan tell mi. So Jesus seh: Two man did owe a next man money. One owe im $500 an di next one owe im $50. None a dem couldn't pay im back. An im tell di two a dem is alright. Now you tell me, which a dem two man a go love him di morer. Hear Simon im, must be di man weh did owe im di $500. An Jesus seh to im, dat's right.
An den Jesus look pon di woman an im seh to Simon, Yu see dat woman? Mi come a yu house, yu no gi mi no water fi wash mi foot. Yu see her, she wash mi foot wid eyewater, an she dry dem off wid her hair. Yu no kiss me. Yu see her, she no stop kiss mi foot. Yu see you, yu no put no oil pon mi head. She, she oil up mi foot. So mek mi tell yu sopn. Mi forgive her fi di whole a fi her sin dem; an dem nuff-nuff. Fi her heart full up a love. Who fa sin lickle bit, dem love lickle bit. An Jesus seh to her, Woman, no fret yu self, no mek notn bother yu. Yu safe.
Louise identified totally with that story of forgiveness, that promise of a woman's life transformed. And she certainly knew how to chuck badness; but she also knew when it was time for a change of heart. Louise's heart condition, reminding her of the vulnerability of her soul case, forced her to contemplate her life and made her choose to become an active Christian. Most of us Jamaicans are passive Christians; that's how we were brought up. It's just part of our culture. All of us went to Sunday school or Sabbath school as the case may be. But in adult life some of us don't bother with the everyday rituals of active commitment to any religion. Wi just a gwaan. We have become secular believers. Even non-believers.
Louise made the decision to return to roots and to be baptised right here in this church, the Pentecostal Gospel Temple. Her philosophical statement about 'Life' appears in her book, I Will Survive: Poems of Reality, published in 1999. I was asked to speak at the launch of the book and what struck me, as I reviewed the poems, was the daring of the author and the wide range of issues she covered. Listen to some to the titles of the poems: A Prayer, Bitter and Sweet, Ghetto Life, Tribute to Panhead, The Don, Sunsplash '94, An Encounter with Immigration, Married for the Landing," Noise Abatement, and one my favourites, Why Envy:
As I read my book of poems,
My friend speechless,
Then as is to say
"They all weren't mine".
But still I drank their wine
With eyes held low,
Lips held closed,
They listened as I read.
On reaching the end
They said,
"Boy, it dread."
Look at their faces,
They are not pleased
To think the least
Of me,
They laugh and tease.
For a girl like me,
Should not spell, please.
Why she?
When she have no time,
To sit and write such
Foolish rhyme.
But yet I proudly
Say it's me
For I learnt before that
I am assured,
I will endure,
I will endure.
But why envy me?
Louise dedicates her book of poetry to a whole set of people and this tells us something about the writer's inclusive vision. As she says in the poem Politics, "This is used to divide a nation./ You can't divide me / I have my friends,/ I don't want to know/ How they vote." So Louise uncompromisingly dedicates her book to her extended family at home and outta street:
I would like to dedicate this book to God first; then my deceased mother Lillian Austin who nurtured me through the years. My brothers and dear nieces and nephews, and my only sister Elizabeth Dorreen Bailey. My daughters Jamila, Latoya, Karen, Ayanna and my only son Che-quevar Campbell. To the artiste Ninjaman a.k.a. Desmond Ballintine, Bounty Killer a.k.a. Rodney Price. The masses of inner-city youths from Rema, Tivoli, Arnett Gardens, Rockfort, Matthews Lane, Hermitage and August Town, Payne Land, Bowerbanks, Dunkirk and to all oppressed youths in the various prisons, also to the Dollars Crew of May Pen. To my beloved husband George Augustus Frazer now deceased, Flo O'Connor my torch of hope. To Mariam Samad, Carolyn Cooper. Dennis Daley, J.C.D.C., S.D.C. staff, Scree Bertram, Zeeks, Dudus, Saunders Lane Crew and finally to Stonelove and members of the S.S.A.J. respect in bad and good times. To my publisher Mike Henry for the support and faith. To you all I give these words of inspiration continually.
