In response TO last week's article, Christmas and the single woman: Interesting. But why only at Christmas?
I have been lonely since the 1970s and I am in my 70s, keeping busy and satisfied.
Perhaps before the Leap Year ends I should try and find some company. One never knows what tomorrow will bring.
J.E. Carter, Kingston
Daddy was always clear: "Faye, I am not saying a man cannot hit you, but it should be the first and last. Remember, he will hit you again."
I grew up with a clear sense that physical abuse was not on my list of things to accept in any relationship. What my parents did not quite prepare me for was 'emotional abuse'. Thank you for your feature on emotional abuse in the Flair magazine, the scars are usually as significant as physical abuse and they sometimes take even longer to heal.
It happens sometimes without our even knowing it. My parents never referred to me as anything but 'a handsome girl' and my father was determined that I go to graduate school because as a 'handsome girl', destined to be single, I needed to be able to support myself.
Later, in my first marriage, I was convinced that I was ugly; that I was overweight (okay, maybe I could stand to lose a few pounds but the pounds I carry do not define me); that my ideas were stupid; that if I ventured into new territory I would not succeed.
The list went on and I shrunk from 5'11" to 5'.
What we need to do as friends and family is to support women working through this abuse. Support the process they must go through to become truly comfortable with who they are and, yes, unless there is serious healing for both, sometimes it means supporting them as they make the choice to walk away from the abuse and to themselves.
I walked away to myself and I am now a proper 6'.
Maureen Webber
