Melville Cooke
'We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness'
'The America declaration of Independence, July 4, 1776'
SO THERE we have it, enshrined in the founding principles of the nation whose populace is determined to spread their gaiety to all others, whether they want it or not, by bomb, soap opera, slam dunk or whatever means necessary. Life is a right, liberty is a right, but happiness is not.
You have to run it down or, rather, run down the money to buy it. Because happiness is the most common commodity traded on the stock market of our lives, with the implication being that the more shares you have the happier you are, the more the stocks are worth the happier you are and if you have preference rather than ordinary shares than whoopee, you are at the peak of this elusive 'happiness'.
IRONIES OF ADVERTISING
It is one of the ironies of modern advertising that the word 'happy' is never used. The smiles, though, say it all. The man who has used Viagra is all teeth, now that he can stand up to any need that may arise, whereas before he had to face up to the fact that he had a certain deficiency; the person who has bought a new car cruises down the highway, hair blowing in the wind; the woman who has that right piece of jewelry is the life of the party, the necklace glistening against her equally glowing skin.
Happiness is not a relative, it is an absolute, as defined by the Oxford dictionary, Ninth Edition (Concise version): complete, utter, perfect. And this is in and of itself. It is not relative to the year car that you drive, it is absolute in you getting to your destination, whether it is in your motor vehicle, by public transportation or by foot. It is not relative to how many times that you can have sex (or orgasm) in one bedroom bout, but absolute in your choosing to have a relationship with a particular person.
CONCEPTS OF HAPPINESS
I am always struck by the fact that the poor have more open faces and smile more than the wealthy, or working to be wealthy. It is also the poor who know how best to enjoy themselves; witness the street dance phenomenon, where the 'have nots' dance with utter (there is the word again) abandon, while the 'haves' stand and watch. Never assume that the man who works on the garbage truck is unhappy or the person who sells sweets at the school gate is less happy than you are, or that you are less happy than somebody grinning from the pages of a 'rich list'.
And, more importantly, do not make your happiness relative to that of someone else. It is a personal, self-contained affair, not the flaunting of teeth and designer clothes that is presented to us 24 hours a day.
I spoke with deejay Bounty Killer once, four years ago, and something he said struck and has since stuck with me. I asked him how he felt, living in Riverton and then Seaview Gardens, selling figurines, my pen poised to write down a tale of woe and even bitterness. He inclined his head and said, "My modda always say suppen, ben' yu mine to yu condition."
Happiness, in many ways, is an accommodation to the circumstances of your life.
It is curious that while the concept of happiness as a family is often portrayed in the adverts, the often tedious pursuit of that family life is never depicted. Sure, the family (mother, father, one girl, one boy) will be in the SUV, smiling and safe, but the budgeting, the diaper changing, the dishwashing, the bed-making that it takes to make a family unit is left on the virtual cutting floor of the editor's computer.
Absolute happiness is attainable and many who have it just don't realise it.
One more thing making other people miserable does not make the misery-maker happy.
Melville Cooke is a freelance writer.
