Carmen Bowen-Wright
PLEASE REMEMBER true wellness means good physical, spiritual and mental health. All three are influenced either positively or negatively by the nature of a particular relationship.
WHAT IS A RELATIONSHIP?
I consider it to be interaction between one human and another; the interaction which exists within groups of persons such as the family or community; lastly, the interaction between a person or persons with their God - not just the God of Christianity, but of all religions.
The interaction alluded to above can be tangible as in physical relationships, however, it is more often emotional, spiritual or all three.
SITUATIONS THAT FOSTER GOOD RELATIONSHIPS
1. The mother, who on giving birth puts her baby to the breast and also subsequently breast- feeds, lays the foundation for a good and lasting relationship with the child. I am sure my colleague, the respected paediatrician, Dr. Maureen Samms-Vaughan will endorse this. So, mothers who resort to bottle feeding to keep their breasts beautiful, beware! In any case, breasts that gradually retract during breastfeeding sag less than the breasts of those who bottle feed.
2. The child who is nurtured with love and understanding, but with firmness, will develop a positive relationship with the relatives. The latter will give rise to a well-balanced, healthy youngster. This youngster usually accomplishes himself or herself in school and in time attains a career or a profession.
3. Good relationships emerge from cohesive family groups and communities. Here people share with each other and are supportive of each other in situations of crisis such as financial needs, ill health or sudden death. They, instead of fighting each other and resorting to violence, use conflict resolution methods. They also mentor each other and each other's children. They are 'beautiful' families and communities to be admired. They serve as role models.
4. A positive relationship with one's God strengthens our mental and spiritual capacity and, by extension, our physical health. There are many persons with severe disabilities, both physical and emotional, yet they are mentally strong. They display an indomitable spirit and are always happy. I have seen such persons in my practice over the years. Most of them are Christians and a few Moslems and Hindus they tell me, "my faith makes me whole" or "I have a God to lean on". In our society, mostly a Christian one, many church attenders are not yet 'saved', they, however, profess to draw spiritual, mental and physical health and wellness from the Bible and the Church.
5. Human sexuality is an interesting subject. It can be wonderful at all periods of the life cycle. It does not have to be genital-to-genital sex only. Hence, in the early years (teens) touching, caressing and paying compliments to each other foster self-esteem, confidence and what is often described as 'a warm feeling between couples'.
As couples mature, 'good sex' makes for happy relationships. It fosters good mental and physical wellness. As couples age and have multiple pathology such as diabetes and/or high blood pressure, genital-to-genital sex may not be possible. Such couples who continue to enjoy non-genital sex by caress, the touching of sensitive parts of the body, and are patient, loving and caring also enjoy 'good sex'.
They retain wellness, which is threefold:
Physical - for example. well-controlled blood pressure and diabetes.
Mental - can function with a normal psyche.
Spiritual - are happy people free of the depressive state of many seniors.
Note: Select seniors can get help from medication that causes sustained erections, if they desire to continue genital to genital sex.
Look out for the column next week when we continue 'Relationships that erode health and wellness'.
Dr. Carmen Bowen-Wright is a preventive medicine specialist and wellness physician; phone: 9274301; email: yourhealth@gleanerjm.com.
