Jah Foresight, Contributor 
WHAT A boring week on the news side! Very few rakes. Brain Lara set his world record and the Kraal case is having some strange twists and turns. The lotto jackpot has a winner and is now back at $10 million.
Nature has really surprised me. This is the first in years since I have ever felt such cool Christmas breeze. It seems that the large number of storms and hurricanes has purified the air. Words cannot describe the feeling but I think that there is hope in this 'bruk-pocket' season. I was scared about global warming and winter getting hotter. I hope that Jamaicans will buy the fake Christmas trees and give nature the chance to correct the damage of deforestation.
I saw a picture of the lady who won the $70 million in the newspaper. She is a lovely woman and I wonder if she is married or taken. There are some lovely lonely people out there. If she is free, I think she should find a handsome lotto winner and just start a business cartel. She will be confused since some men will only see her just for her money and not real love. It is not only women who are gold diggers. I noticed that she was trying to disguise her loveliness. She had on dark glasses and I assumed a wig. What she should have done is to put on a false moustache and sideburns. She would have looked more like bin Laden.
CONSIDER HEAVY MAKE-UP
It is extremely important that one consider heavy make-up or disguise if you win the lotto. I can imagine some macho men saying, 'Jah Foresight must be mad, he could never be a Rastaman'. I did not mention the word 'drag'. On second thought, appearing in drag will be an excellent idea. Can you imagine a tough back Jamaican man turning up at Supreme Ventures in his dress and high heeled shoes to collect the lotto jackpot? That would be world-class disguise fit for Scotland Yard. I am sure that the underworld would have a problem with identity if they plan to kidnap you and ask for a ransom. I am not demoting heterosexuality as a renowned homophobic country, but I am just providing a formula to save life, wealth and property.
Women play a very important part in rakes for the game. The cash pot winners can testify to this. I do not have to go into any detail, but ask any male punter and they will tell you that they keep their eyes real open for rakes. One of my friends commented to me this week that since the advent of the Christmas breeze, women seem to look 'phat, fatter and rounder'.
I nearly lost my life this Wednesday because of a woman. I just bought my lotto ticket and I was driving towards an intersection. Appearing in front of my car was this young lady dressed in one of the cutest micro-minis I have ever seen. It was black leather. She slowly and sensuously glided in front of my car. I am a religious man but my imagination started to click. I nearly overturned into a ditch across the road. I now started to understand why in countries like Iraq women are completely covered. Some of the prettiest women I have ever seen are from the Middle East and their only competition is from Ethiopians, Latinos and Jamaicans.
WINNING NUMBERS
The winning numbers for last Saturday were:
7 (widow, stockings, handsome); 14 (mouth, bush, friend, wild cat); 20 (sick parent, bread, pregnant); 24 (fresh water, carpenter, lamb); 25 (john crow, crowd, worthless); 26 (castle, white man, officials) and the bonus ball of 33. With the three consecutive numbers of 24, 25 and 26, the jackpot must had a winner.
The winning numbers for last Wednesday were:
3 (Broom, dead, garlic); 7 (widow, handsome); 20 (pregnant, naked woman) 28; (ram goat, fowl, adultery); 32 (gold, honey, red rum); 35 (goat, oven) and the bonus number of 33. There was no consecutive numbers but the repeated number of 7 across the draws.
I am now the father of a son. I might just give him the name of Lottogan. What a cruel daddy. I was amazed at the large number of young girls at the maternity ward. Girls, coitus is simple but motherhood is complexity. Youth man, or sugar daddy, accept your fatherhood and remember that there are plenty of ways to try on the jacket.
I have spent weeks teaching the importance of rakes. You might notice that I give, but I do not translate them into numbers for you. Next year, I will be looking deeply at some qualitative analysis of the draw numbers. You can now classify me as a Lotto scientist and then I will be on par with some of the other experts on this page!
Keep it lock at jahforesight@hotmail.com
