Nashauna Drummond, Staff Reporter
Man well rough woman no stop request the wuk
Yes she have fi draw fi the pillow
Bedroom destruction woman you man a killa ...
Woman a wiggle jus a jiggle a cry you get bigga ...
Ambulance wouldn't come
Dem hafi send fi de barrow
- Buju Banton (Hush baby hush)
WITH DANCEHALL music bolstering men to make women scream and moan during sexual intercourse, it begs the question, "Do Jamaican men really understand foreplay?"
It's all good if she screams, but men please note that when she screams it's often not in ecstasy but because of pain. Let's take the words of Terror Fabulous in his duet with Nadine Sutherland, Action not a bag a mouth
"Gal a bawl inna agony and halla out cho. Hard-core loving man you musi insane, woman no waan no man fi mek she feel pain. Sweet loving in the falling rain."
Well, maybe not in the rain but lovemaking is meant to be enjoyable not torturous; hence, foreplay.
To put it in a medical perspective, when a woman is not aroused her vagina is in a relaxed state. It is not an open tunnel (as most think). As she becomes aroused, the vagina gets longer and wider. Two special glands at the entrance of the vagina called Bartholin's gland produce extra secretions to provide proper lubrication during intercourse.
If the vagina is not properly lubricated, then it will be very painful having such a sensitive area pounded over and over again, as many men are inclined to do.
Foreplay techniques
Look, she's not going anywhere, its not a race to eclipse Asafa Powell's record, so take your time.
One of the greatest foreplay techniques can be non-physical. Just talking to her and even making her laugh, will make her very relaxed and comfortable, which is key. This differs from woman to woman, but once she's comfortable, everything else will fall into place. Some like it fast, some slow, but during this non-physical foreplay, if you're astute, you will figure it out.
Kissing is very important (see Flair of February 13). Men, you must learn how to kiss her gently at first, letting your lips caress hers. A tongue that plunges like a farmer digging a yam hole, is not arousing.
Caress her with your tongue. Women love to be caressed gently. Place feather kisses on her ear lobe, neck, shoulders and finger tips, all the time, with just a hint of tongue. Trust me, this will have her tingling all over (not a cat bath!).
At this stage, you can become a bit more assertive, kissing her more intensely.
Move down her neck to any opening that maybe in her clothing. Don't just go ripping off her clothes.
Stroke her cleavage slowly with your fingers while kissing her. Her breathing will become irregular (if your doing it properly). That will be your green light for your lips to follow your fingers. Stick to the openings, just the openings.
Slowly extend the openings to get as much skin as possible, kissing the areas that weren't exposed before.
When you get to her breast stroke the outline gently and repeatedly leaving the centre until the final moment creating anticipation.
By now, she's breathing even harder and by her body language, your biggest sex organ (the brain), should tell you to proceed to home base. Believe me men, women have been known to have orgasms during foreplay. And remember, you are never too old to learn so read and better yet, ask her to tell you what turns her on.
