THE EDITOR, Sir:
"YAH FOOL! Sit down, yah rudeboy!", I heard the tired, frustrated teacher say to a misbehaving student. At the time, this small incident made me realise how great were all the criticisms I'd seen Jamaican adults heap on children over the years. 'Fool' and 'rude' were two I'd seen most commonly used to try to shame a child into cooperation.
Having taught school successfully in both the United States and Jamaica, I've also had considerable experience in disciplinary matters. That said, please allow me to offer a well-tested and well-proven bit of advice for teachers and parents everywhere.
Throughout childhood, the 'bonds' we form with our parents are established through the predominant use of praise and reward, if only for the simplest of things. When strangers criticise us, we listen to their guidance only when we have somehow 'bonded' with them, meaning we have established a relationship or formed an association with them in some way, one that means something to us. Whether we realise it or not, such negative criticisms as 'fool' and 'rude', though they can be temporarily effective, can be seriously damaging to a youth's developing personality in the long run.
A good, working alternative and a good rule to remember, is one I call 'the hand of friendship.' It goes like this: "See the hand you give me as a friend? There are four fingers and a thumb. If we act to praise each other four times as often as we act to criticise, we will most likely always listen to each other and always be friends."
Imagine the impact on Jamaica's schools tomorrow, if every teacher followed this 'four-to-one' rule today and every day.
I am, etc.,
ED McCOY
mmhobo48@juno.com
Via Go-Jamaica
