
Ivret WilliamsWe wear the mask that
grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and
shades our eyes---
This debt we pay to human guile;
With torn and bleeding
hearts we smile,
And mouth with myriad subtleties.
Paul Laurence Dunbar
WHO AM I is the fundamental question that life requires us to answer. In a relationship, the question, however, is not only who am I but also who are you? A knowledge of self is just as important as knowing who you are. The kind caring person that you are on the surface, are you the same person under the skin?
When you are alone in your car, do you smile at the obnoxious motorist as you do when I am in the car with you?
During dating, persons try their best to impress each other. And many masks are used to camouflage the 'real' person. Persons will have to decipher whether or not the person smiling at them from across the candlelit table is the 'real deal' or simply a well fortified mask.
Some persons will remove the mask quicker than others. The length of time that a mask remains will be determined by the person concerned. An individual may keep the mask in place for emotional protection.
This person might have shown genuine feelings in the past only to end up being hurt. Not until they are sure of the other person's true feelings will the mask be removed. During this time, they may act aloof for fear that if they disclose their true feelings they may be rejected.