Wendel Abel
YEARS OF clinical experience have forced me to grapple with some of the realities of child-rearing in Jamaica and their impact on personality
development.
Although 60 per cent of our households are headed by a single female and in many households the father is absent, many researchers acknowledge that this type of family can still function healthily.
Slavery and persistent poverty have resulted in the disintegration of our family structures and led to certain patterns, practices and problems that continue to plague our family systems. Many societal problems today are due to what I refer to as the toxic triad:
1. Parental neglect and abandonment
2. Multiple shifting
3. Abuse
PARENTAL NEGLECT
Many children grow up in households where a father is absent but other male figures such as grandfathers, stepfathers, uncles or family friends have been present and exerted a stabilising role.
It is rejection or neglect by both mother and father which has a more profound impact on the development of our children and on personality development.
Far too many children grow in an environment in which they do not experience an environment which is trusting, loving and caring.
Parental neglect and rejection even occur in an environment in which both parents may be present but fail to provide the necessary emotional support and guidance and it certainly exists in environments in which parents have migrated or sent their children to live with other family members or friends.
MULTIPLE SHIFTING
This refers to moving children from one caregiver to another over a lifetime. This may be due to migration of parent(s), separation or other factors. Multiple shifting disturbs the process that a child needs to establish trusting, healthy and meaningful relationships.
The common forms of abuse of children are emotional, physical and verbal. Many children are often shifted to or left to be cared by their grandmothers or other family members. Sociologists have coined the word the 'non-evolved grandmother' - she is the grandmother who has not been allowed to evolve into her natural role as grandmother. She still has to undertake the tasks of child-rearing and parenting. Non-evolved grandmothers are at great risk of becoming frustrated, burning out and experiencing depression. Therefore, they may become harsh in disciplining the many children for whom they are forced to assume financial and emotional responsibility.
These grandmothers respond to their grandchildren in an ambivalent manner, sometimes they are loving and caring, at other times they may be harsh. This creates emotional confusion and conflict in many children.
NATIONAL ALLIANCE
We clearly as a society need to place greater emphasis on parenting and child rearing. As a society we also need to provide more services to children and families at the community level. Towards this end we are establishing the National alliance of Child and Family Services. This is a network of service providers in churches and non-governmental organisations which provide crisis counselling and other supportive services. For further information in becoming a part of this network either as a counsellor or a provider, call 977-0423.
Dr. Wendel Abel is a consultant psychiatrist and senior lecturer, University of the West Indies; email: yourhealth@gleanerjm.com.
