I am to get married pretty soon, and as much as I love my partner, I would rather take my secret to the gravel. If I don't, I know it would take my fiancé to his.

Some time ago, I discovered that I was pregnant. At first I was happy and he wanted to tell the world; he told everybody, even our neighbour, who congratulated me every time he saw me. Weeks went by and we were very happy. One morning I went to work and sat at my desk thinking about our child and what I should call him or her.

Suddenly I remembered that four weeks earlier, I had made love to a guy I was seeing on the side, and I was also four weeks pregnant. I almost wet my pants. I started to shake, I ran to the restroom and sat there for almost an hour thinking, sweating and shaking like a leaf.

Did not learn lesson

Then I came to the conclusion that I must have an abortion. Later I told my partner, he begged me not to. He went on his knees and started crying but I had already done it. It was hard for him to get over it but he did.

I didn't learn my lesson and went back to sleeping with the same guy. Last year I was hospitalised because of an ectopic pregnancy. This is because my lover on the side gave me the morning-after pills to take and I was already pregnant. My fiancé was so torn up seeing me all hooked up with intravenous drips, thinking how he hurt me. I couldn't ease the pain of his heart because it would kill him to know that I was sleeping with someone else and had even become pregnant twice. This is my secret and I'm taking it to the grave.

- Guilty but hiding

Tell us your deep dark secret

Do you have a deep dark secret that you'd rather take to your grave but feel an urge to divulge because you are about to walk down the aisle? Flair wants you to tell us first and we'll help you decide.

Did you have a one-night stand in the early stages of courtship? What if it were his or her sibling or parent? Were you raped? Are you a victim of incest?

Did you participate in an orgy and God forbid-was it taped? Do you feel that it's better to clear the air now and risk it all rather than live a lie?

Send us the details as a prelude to your final confession and we will publish it. Let the expert advise you on the way to proceed. Your identity will be protected.

Send responses to: Deep, Dark Secret

Lifestyle@gleanerjm.com

OR The Gleaner

7 North Street, Kingston.