Keisha Shakespeare- Blackmore, Staff Reporter
Guys, does it seem like you just cannot get enough sex? Would you go to extreme lengths just to get some satisfaction? Perhaps you are a sex addict.
Dr. Sidney McGill, sex therapist, explains that sex addiction occurs when the person feels powerless to overcome the behaviour to the point where life becomes unbearable. He notes that the person is troubled by unwanted behaviour such as masturbation. Sex addiction is usually progressive from early adolescence to early adulthood. The person is out of control, feels tremendous pain, shame and self-loathing and he or she would like to stop, but keeps falling back. Both women and men suffer from sex addiction, but it seems more prevalent in men.
Hollywood examples
In fact, two Hollywood celebrities, Eric Benet and Michael Douglas, confessed that they were sex addicts.
There are myths surrounding sex addiction, making it difficult to understand. But it should not be confused with people who have a high libido or who are nymphomaniacs (women with abnormal sexual desires).
A person who is a sex addict is like a drug addict. The individual will have any form of sex (cyber, telephone, etc.) and with anyone, any time.
Married men
For example, some married men cannot resist approaching a woman he has never met and making sexual advances - even just a quickie. However, people with high libido just love sex and are usually satisfied afterwards. On the other hand, nymphomania is usually associated with females, and according to Dr. McGill, it is sometimes associated with women who were abused, molested or raped at some point in their youth.
Warning Signs
Dr. Patrick Carnes, sex addiction expert, suggests 10 possible warning signs:
1. Feeling that your behaviour is out of control.
2. Being aware that there may be severe consequences if you continue.
3. Feeling unable to stop your behaviour, despite knowing the consequences.
4. Persistently pursuing destructive and or high-risk activities.
5. Wanting to stop or control what you're doing and taking active steps to limit them.
6. Using sexual fantasies as a way of coping with difficult feelings or situations.
7. Needing more sexual activity in order to experience the same high.
8. Experiencing intense mood swings around sexual activity.
9. Spending an increasing amount of time planning, engaging in or regretting and recovering from sexual activities.
10. Neglecting important social, occupational or recreational activities in favour of sexual behaviour.
Consequences
There are consequences when someone is a sex addict, especially when it is misunderstood as just being 'wild'. Dr. McGill said that victims might end up losing valuable relationships. They might have difficulty at work, low self-esteem and financial trouble if the addiction requires money.
He recommends treatment in the form of group therapy where couples both go through counselling.
For help with sex addiction or related condition, consult Dr. McGill at 972-1805 or email: fccjam@yahoo.com.