Glenda Simms

During the month of December, the good folks at the One-Stop-Shop in the village on the ridge of the Santa Cruz Mountains seize every opportunity to reflect on the local happenings, the idiosyncratic behaviours of each other, and the sheen and texture of the myriad of stars that take on special and magical meanings at this time of the year.

Last Sunday evening, both Miss Mattie and Maas George seem to embody the pensive mood that takes hold of the old-timers during the festive season.

Everyone had congregated on the veranda to plan for the upcoming communal Christmas dinner.

New 'foot look'

Hottie-Hottie, in contrast to the other folks, was in a special upbeat and animated mood. She had just returned from Santa Cruz where she purchased the latest and blondest of blonde wigs and a set of multicoloured plastic fingernails.

She did not forget the tools and glues that will keep these talons on her fingers during the Christmas season. She also did not leave out the lowly toenails. They were painted with a white polish and each one was decorated with a different coloured little bird in flight.

Hottie's feet were carefully pushed into a tiny 'made in China' strapped sandal which helped to display her new 'foot look'.

Maas George took a good look at Hottie-Hottie and whispered softly to Miss Mattie, "Hottie really looks like an artificial Christmas tree!"

Miss Mattie smiled knowingly and in a soft voice reserved for the brief moments when she feels some fondness for the old boy, replied in his ear, "Maas George, leave Hottie-Hottie alone. She is the brightest star on our social Christmas tree. She is a rural girl who imitates the best qualities of urban 'bhuttooism'. She laughs at everyone and she doesn't give a damn what anyone thinks of her."

In fact, Miss Mattie further pointed out to Maas George that Hottie-Hottie has chosen to live in her community.

She did not follow the other young people who drifted off to Kingston and Montego Bay and ended up jobless and disenfranchised in some of the roughest sectors of these cities, and among some of the most 'dog-hearted' people.

DEmanded attention

Maas George listened and nodded approvingly of Miss Mattie's deep understanding of the dynamics of the community.

He was contemplating the appropriate 'praise and worship' terms of endearment that would not cause Miss Mattie to take a big gulp of her white rum on the rocks and roll her eyes in the direction of the Great Master or Missis (depending on the phase of the moon).

As usual, before Maas George could muster up the courage to break the ice, Miss Mattie demanded the attention of everyone on the veranda.

She pointed out to all and sundry that there are too many unusual and evil activities that have crept into the districts of the Santa Cruz Mountain range.

According to Miss Mattie, when she was as young as Hottie-Hottie, she knew the difference between right and wrong.

And when she became a full-blown woman moving through the different stages of her development and change, she came to believe that human beings were designed to live well-balanced and rewarding ordinary lives and die of natural causes.

"That is exactly how it should be," shouted Maas George.

In support

At this point, Hottie climbed up on the domino table and shut down the game that was in progress and was at that dramatic moment when one young fellow held up his right arm and was about to shout 'six love'.

Hottie apologised for breaking up the game. She just wanted to make the point, in support of Miss Mattie's concern, that in these parts, more and more persons are dying of unnatural causes.

Just last week, she reminded her friends, in the sleepy district of Potsdam, an older man was murdered by his son and his brother. The body was discovered when a neighbour saw a finger sticking out of a mound of freshly-dug earth behind the man's house.

This real-life story grabbed the attention of both the young and the old, and everyone nodded when Hottie declared in her best Sunday voice that "things must change for the better."

She said she had learnt from her dear departed grandmother, who had the privilege of living to celebrate 98 years of life and died of natural causes, that these districts are sacred places where the ancestral spirits still roam.

According to Hottie, young people like herself have been disconnected from the values and attitudes that characterised the generation represented by Miss Mattie and Maas George.

Mutterings

One of the young domino players who was not amused by Hottie's antics and her perceived 'holier than thou, born again' pronouncements, muttered under his breath that Hottie-Hottie was 'kissing up' so that she would be chosen to accompany Miss Mattie and Maas George to Santa Cruz when their foreign Christmas money comes through Western Union.

Such mutterings are good for the young man's soul but he dared not say aloud what was on his mind. He knew he would have been reprimanded by everyone at the gathering because no one would want to offend Miss Mattie or Maas George. These were elders who are respected, even when no one agrees with their views on the state of the nation.

On the other hand, the young men of the district learnt at an early age not to get on Hottie-Hottie's nerves. She has been known to use her verbal and sarcastic skills to bring the bravest of mountain men to tears. It was, therefore, not surprising that everyone joined in describing the evil acts that are eroding the stability of rural folk. They mentioned the cases of rapes, stabbings, cow and goat stealing, rumour-mongering, kid-napping and other unusual and unacceptable behaviours.

Different groups

Miss Mattie made sure that everyone had an opportunity to voice his or her concerns, and she asked Hottie-Hottie to climb down from her perch on the domino table.

She closed off the meeting by reminding all those gathered that Christmas is a season of rebirth and new beginnings.

To really celebrate the season, she would be organising different groups to clean up the community, pick the sorrel, bake the cakes and prepare for the communal dinner on Christmas day.

Miss Mattie also told all her friends that her niece would be home from Canada. At this point, Maas George picked up his lantern and reminded Miss Mattie that it was getting dark and they both had to pick their way through the narrow rocky path to their unlit houses.

True to form, Hottie-Hottie offered to accompany Maas George and Miss Mattie to their humble abodes, and, surprisingly, the angry domino player volunteered to join her in this good deed.

Glenda P. Simms is a gender expert and consultant.