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Stabroek News

Relationship resolutions for the New Year
published: Sunday | December 31, 2006

Angela Philipps, Contributor

Are you sick of the same New Year's resolutions year after year? Tired of making promises to yourself that you cannot keep?

They tend to go something like this:

1. Go to the gym three times a week.

2. Stop eating junk food and lose 10 pounds.

3. Stop smoking

4. Be more tidy

5. Be more organised in general.

In fact, if you sat at a particular table each year to write these down, the words would eventually be ingrained on its surface! I am not making fun here you know. All I am saying is, if you find yourself pledging the same things every January first, and never fulfilling any of them, then maybe it's time to scrap the list and go back to the drawing board.

How about setting goals for one aspect of your life? And as this column is about being single in the city, why don't you make it be about relationships?

Even a confident, single lass like me wishes, at times, that I had someone in my life. I love being on my own, but there are many moments when it would be rather nice to have a man with whom I could talk to late at night, watch a Sunday afternoon movie, share my problems, or sit and listen to music. I am no relationship guru, I mess up as much as the next person, but I try to look at things objectively afterwards and correct my mistakes.

I wanted to write something poignant for my first column in 2007, so I have been jotting down notes on how to improve my dating potential in the next 12 months.

Resolutions for Women

1. Unless there is something morally off about a man, accept all dates - you never know!

2. If a man treats you well on a first date, do something nice for him within a couple days (cook him dinner, drop off a bottle of wine or cookies at his house). Men like to be treated well, and you'll be surprised how impressed he will be with the gesture.

3. Don't be too quick to brush off a man who comes along with some corny chat up line like most guys, he's nervous and fears rejection, so give him a chance.

4. Ask at least one man out yourself - it's no easy task, but it'll make you appreciate the difficult position men are in.

5. When asked if you'd like to go out, suggest to him that you do something he likes to do - good to know and appreciate his interests from the get-go, as he'll never give them up.

Resolutions for Men

(Please note that these are short and sweet.)

1. Do not expect any form of sex after a first date!

2. Make more effort to tell a woman about what you are feeling - she can't read your mind.

3. Show interest in a woman's job/work. She'll have more respect for you.

4. Do not play hard to get, unless you're still a teenager - seriously!

5. Bathe regularly with good soap - women LOVE a man who smells good.

These are fairly easy and realistic targets to aim for. You are not asking yourself to sacrifice that chocolate mousse or strawberry cheesecake, nor are you putting yourself under pressure to rush home every night to do the laundry and clean the house after a long day at the office. You are simply giving yourself a chance to lighten up a bit this year, have a little fun on the dating scene and not take life so seriously.

Happy New Year!

angelaphilippsja@hotmail.com.

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