Angela Philipps, Contributor

What do you do when one of your finest girlfriends tells you that she likes your favourite pal in the world? Set them up, of course! Unless you're scared it'll change the relationship you have with him.

This is sort of a continuation to the article I wrote on whether men and women can really be just buddies. You establish a friendship with someone of the opposite sex and you become so close to him that you can't bear the thought of another woman getting in the way of what you have, even though the love you share is purely platonic. What's worse is that the lucky lady happens to be like a big sister to you.

Not so long ago a friend of mine told me that she was beginning to like my pal rather a lot! It was a little shocking and for some reason it hurt to hear her tell me this. Then I thought about it for a couple minutes; well, at least she knew how things were between him and me, and she wouldn't be jealous of me hanging out with him. A stranger would never understand! In fact, it would be perfect - all three of us being together.

Extremely weird

But the truth is, it's not as easy as it seems. I do different things with each of these people and it would be extremely weird for me to see the two of them 'together'. I watch sports with my pal, we have conversations which I don't impart with any of my girlfriends, and we both go beyond the 'call of duty' of a male/female friendship. There is nothing physical about it, but there is a deep emotional connection which I can't explain. Anyone who became intimate with either of us would not be comfortable with how we are.

If they do blossom into a 'couple', this would all have to change. It wouldn't be fair on her to continue the way we were, and I think this would also be the case if I was to have a man in my life. Andso I have an imminent loss. Therefore, would it be better if the woman were someone I didn't know? Probably she would not be aware of my pain, so I could never blame her.

However, I hold no resentment for my girl. She is a loving, kind and loyal friend, who I wish all the happiness in the world. She has been there for me through thick and thin over the years, and she deserves everything wonderful which life has to offer. Who am I to stop this possible union? You can't help who you fall for, and it comes along so infrequently that we should not be hindering something beautiful.

I have no idea if my pal is aware of her sentiments, and it's up to them to discover each other if that is what's meant to be. I can't get involved, nor do I want to interfere. But I won't lie to you - it has taken all my compassion, intelligence, will (and a few tears) to get through this little piece of 'news'! I can't be a baby, especially as there is no one with whom I can talk to about what I am feeling. Sometimes it's better to deal with such occurrences yourself rather than drawing others into a situation. Oh, the tangled webs we so often weave, they're not worth it!

It's bound to happen at some point, though - my best pal will find a lady love and I shall simply have to accept it, particularly if she turns out to be my best gal!

angelaphilippsja@hotmail.com