Rosemaire Voordouw, Contributor

The act of listening plays an important role in human relationships, both on the personal and professional level.

At the workplace, listening failures can and do cause countless problems every day. The problem with poor listening is that it is a habit. And like all habits you must first break it and then put a new habit in its place. It is, therefore, very important to master the techniques of active listening, and how to use your body language to show that you are really listening to a speaker.

Here we will examine how excellent listening habits can be used as a powerful tool in all your social, personal and professional relationships.

Supervising/team dynamics will improve as:

Benefit from improved team spirit when you begin to set the example of really listening to what individuals have to say.

You can spot conflicts before they develop and understand issues that persons may have been shy about broaching with you.

You get greater respect and value from your team as they will willingly put out more effort.

Have a team that will advise you early when things are going wrong, so that you can address problems in a timely manner.

Relationship with your Director/Team leader

Your boss will appreciate the clarity of communication that will result from your truly listening.

You will benefit from knowing exactly what you are expected to do.

You will have a clearer understanding of your customers' needs and desires, as well as the things that make them unhappy.

Relationship with your Peers

Your relationships with your peers will also improve dramatically as the flow of communication becomes smoother.

How to become a terrific listener?

It will take commitment and practice, until it becomes a habit. You may also engage the support of family, friends and even your staff.

1. First you must resolve to be more interested in hearing what the speaker has to say than in sharing your opinion. Instead of interrupting, jot down a note if you can or file the thought away and re-focus on the speaker. Making mental notes of what the speaker is saying will help to take your attention from your own thoughts.

2. Open your mind and release your tendency to judge what the speaker's opinion is and this will free you to really hear what she/he is saying.

3. Finally ask questions. Don't be afraid to say "Could you explain that some more for me?" "Is this what you meant?" However, a barrage of questions about insignificant details can frustrate the other person. Make sure to concentrate on the main points.

Summary

There are entire books written on how to listen effectively. Feel free to read as much as you can about the topic. But don't get bogged down in loads of theory. Take one recommendation at a time, practice it until it becomes a habit, then try the next. You will find that as you become a better listener, you will notice your bad habits on your own and work on shedding them. Also be patient with yourself. Remember this will take time.

The author is director, Scotiabank's Employee Consultations and Ombudsman's Services.

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