Petrina Francis, Staff Reporter
RAPE IS a traumatic event which often scars a woman for life and sometimes prevents her from engaging in intimate activities she once enjoyed.
But according to family and marriage therapist Dr Sidney McGill, confidence in intimacy can be restored through counselling and the help of a supportive partner.
By Jamaican law, rape is punishable by life imprisonment. For attempted rape, the accused gets a period not exceeding 10 years.
However, many victims feel that the offender never receives full punishment under law, while the victims carry the scars for the rest of their lives.
rebuilding trust
McGill says an individual's ability to rediscover intimacy is dependent on whether or not the rapist is known to the victim. If the rapist is known, there is the issue of rebuilding trust. He disclosed that if the rapist is unknown, the problem is even more severe in restoring intimacy. The victim, he said, can overcome this hurdle through professional counselling.
The family and marriage therapist said depending on how traumatic the event was and the person's emotional state at the time, the reaction to the rape can be severe, including depression and post-traumatic stress disorder.
"The idea is to reduce the level of anxiety and rebuild a sense of worth. One of the things that will happen is that the victim will feel dirty and that they have lost value," McGill said.
Some who are obsessive-compulsive, the counsellor said, will clean their body excessively, trying to wash away the rapist's touch.
McGill says a traumatic event like rape can bring partners closer together as the supporting partner has to give the victim more care.
petrina.francis@gleanerjm.com
McGill's tips to rediscover intimacy Courting and emotional massaging is important. Let the person know that you are there for him or her. Sex is not something he or she wants to engage in immediately.
Expect that the person is not going to want to be touched in his or her pelvic area because of the traumatic memories.
Do not have sex unless he or she wants it.
He or she should resume daily activities as soon as possible to distract from the event.
Confront the situation. Look at the area where the rape took place, preferably with someone who is close to the victim.
Journalise by expressing your anger and your hurt.
The rape victim should try to regain control of his or her life.
The partner has to understand the symptoms that the victim will express. Anger, hurt, short-temperedness are a few of them. Do not take them personal.
Re-engage in normal life routines and have a network of support so the victim can become reintegrated.
