World Championships 100m gold medallist Tyson Gay (left) with Jamaica's world 100m record holder Asafa Powell. - file

This is between mi an' Asafa, so everybody pull up a chair and listen.

'Alfafa', hear me now. I know people are talking about how you must be worried now that Usain ran such a great time at the invitational meet. And then there is the pectoral muscle injury you're recovering from (how you hurt it in the first place?) and that 'gay' fellow is still running well.

Long and short, I know you have plenty on your mind at the moment. So here's my advice. Don't worry 'bout 'Lightning Bolt'. I am no track expert but I'm not sure Usain is necessarily built to consistently run the 100 metres so fast. If Usain starts running times below 9.90 regularly, then great. But I just don't know if he can duplicate that performance, especially at a major event.

Rigorous training

As for the muscle, athletes get injured all the time. Some people who don't understand the type of rigorous training you go through might wonder how you hurt a chest muscle when you're using your legs to run. But we'll mark it down to strenuous work. As for Tyson Gay, having seen him recently, he's not as tall as I thought. At least Justin Gatlin was about your height. Never be afraid of somebody who doesn't look like he could beat you up in a fight. So stop fretting about him and just picture him as a baby in diapers crying for his mommy, anytime you feel anxious.

Oh, and Alfalfa, if you really want motivation, look to Michael Johnson. He claims that the only way you can beat Gay is to trip him. What a piece of feistiness! You know, I would have told Johnson about his "breadcart" and other such words of refinement. Out of order! If you really want to stick it to him, after you win the race and are parading with the Jamaican flag, just take out a small banner saying "Hey Mike, trip up your dinner!".

Gentle person

Oh, but you're a gentle person, I forgot! Alright, no problem. Unlike me, you are a man of quiet disposition. The most anger I have ever seen from you was at the Golden League meet when the starter fired the gun too quickly. But other than that, you're quiet; which is great with the ladies, but for competition, you need a little beast in you! So tell you what, before the race, just let out a couple of loud snarls (like bad dogs) and act like somebody just dis' your mummy! Yes man, the other seven guys must back off, Gay included.

Alright, Alfalfa, you have now received the method. Now go forward and win the gold (and let off some for my counsellor's fee). Respect.

Cheer on Mr Powell with me at daviot.kelly@gleanerjm.com.

Daviot Kelly