For thousands of years men have struggled with this question. How can he have a bevy of beauties eating out of his hands? Why do some men have women swooning in their presence while other men are ignored?

Well! This week I will shed some light on this complex subject and unveil the truth that drives women to accept or reject male advances.

Men are naturally competitive and work valiantly to gain high status, thus enabling them to control resources and attract women. However, regretfully, in our society men must date and court women to get a life mate.

Dating and courting allows the woman time to evaluate her admirers and to fine tune her assessment regarding his suitability.

So! What do women really want?

Research findings have shown that women and men differ markedly in the criteria they use to choose a life partner. Men as a rule are attracted to young good looking women with a waist hip ratio of 0.7. But women are far more discriminatory and attach greater significance to core values rather than physical attributes. Here are some essential qualities that a woman wants in her life partner.

A man with adequate resources

A man's present resources and earning potential are critical to women. It indicates his capacity to nurture and maintain the relationship and meet the needs of his family.

An assertive man

A woman wants an alpha male, one who is assertive and assumes control of his resources to ensure that his needs are met.

A man with power and status

A man's social standing is a real turn-on for many women; it denotes latent aggression, self-assurance, intelligence and strong ambition. This affinity for powerful men speaks to her need for security and stability in her relationship. They abhor wimps who are dominated by others and who can't cope with life's challenges.

Dependability and stability

These qualities in a man speak to his commitment to share his resources and to be there for his family despite the vicissitudes of life.

Size, strength, and maturity

Women like tall, strong men. In surveys in the United States, most women stated that the desired height of their mate should be six feet (182.88 cm). A man with a well-honed body and good posture will always have an edge in the mating game. Many women are also attracted to older men who tend to exude more confidence than their younger counterparts and usually have more material resources and personal power, and are deemed to be more stable and reliable.

Health and physical fitness

Recent research reveals that women are more influenced by how a man smells than how he looks! Healthy men tend to smell good and are desired by women since they have a fair prospect of siring healthy offspring and enjoying a long and productive life. A woman's ability to sniff out undesirable men is done unconsciously and is based on the subliminal chemical odours related to men's immune systems. It appears that women are attracted to men with an immune system different from theirs. From an evolutionary view point this has proven to facilitate the survival of her offspring. These chemicals are called pheromones (Androstenol and androstenone)

In well-controlled studies, women were able to use these pheromones to differentiate men with similar immune systems from men with quite different immune systems.

Women who selected men with different immune systems produced children with robust defence mechanisms to fend off life-threatening diseases.

It has also been shown that the degree of satisfaction with a marriage or long-term relationship correlated with significant differences in immune systems and that the most dissatisfied couples had the most similar immune systems.

Love and Commitment

This quality denotes a man's willingness to give his undivided attention and his resources unconditionally to his partner and offspring. It also implies the man's promise of future fidelity and continued protection.

Sense of Humour

Many women find a sense of humour refreshing in a partner. Its presence adds colour and camaraderie to any relationship. A witty man is also deemed to be smart.

Emotional Intelligence, Kindness, and Sensitivity

The innate capacity (emotional intelligence) to resolve problems, plus kindness and sensitivity in relating to others, is essential to maintaining a stable relationship and raising well adjusted children.

A deep voice

A deep voice influenced by testosterone can be quite seductive. Psychology professor David Feinberg, of McMaster University in Ontario, studied Tanzania's Hadza tribesmen, one of the world's last hunter-gatherer communities, and found that the richer and lower a man's voice, the more children he had.

A good looking man

Many studies have revealed that women do like handsome men but this is very low on their rating scale.

It is therefore obvious that men and women are wired differently for survival and mating and for both sexes to interact harmoniously and launch forth on a long-term, committed and mutually satisfactory relationship, they need to understand their uniqueness, their strengths and weaknesses and work assiduously to meet the expectations of each partner. Happy Hunting.

Source: The Science of Romance: Why We Love - Jeffrey Kluger, The Anatomy of Love - Helen Fisher.