The soloist, Contributor

The subject is still taboo, so I was very surprised when one of my sister's friends who had sworn off sex toys began to ask me about them. She recently broke up with her guy and was not coping with the absence of regular sex. Plus, she claims that she cannot bring herself to masturbate with her fingers, so could I suggest some trusted friends.

I am somewhat of an expert on a number of the reliable battery-operated sources of pleasure. I have been a staunch advocate of masturbation all my life, but I was introduced to sex toys by my man who had to be away from home a lot on long overseas trips. He also said they make great additions to any lovemaking session and together, we have had scores of threesomes.

Preference

But over the years, I have sort of grown to prefer using them when he's not around. My view is, if a man is in my bed, he should be able to excite me with any of the live 'sex organs' on his body! You know, fingers, toes, ears, nose, elbow, tongue, etc.

So, like good friends do, we discussed our girlfriend's plight, gathered at our latest convert's place with our arsenals for a show and tell. She turned every colour of the rainbow, but she ordered one online and just can't seem to get enough of it.

We swapped stories about some narrow-minded men who abhor the gadgets so much, one of them even threatened to rub pepper sauce on Mary'sbullet. All the same, it is easy to understand why a man would regard something guaranteed to give his woman a lifetime of orgasms (they continue into the night long after he has arrived and leaves her wanting); they are jealous of the little harmless things.

So, for the uninitiated, here are some reasons for trying out sex toys:

1. They are reliable, as long as you keep a constant supply of batteries.

2. The will not give you STDs (as long as you keep them to yourselves).

3. They are easy to keep clean and blend right in with the contents of the underwear drawer.

4. They are portable and can go anywhere with you.

5. Some of them can be worn all day, keeping you in a permanent state of euphoria while all around you are stressed.

6. They do not get upset and refuse to perform when the real thing is around.

7. They guarantee mind-blowing orgasms all the time.

8. In some places, doctors recommend them when one partner develops problems, such as complications from diabetes, prostate cancer or premature ejaculation.

Name changed to protect privacy.

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