Salmon

This is the eighth instalment in our series from the book, Parenting - A Child's Perspective, written by Dr Jaslin Salmon.

I am glad Mom didn't spank me or yell at me. I really didn't mean to be bad. I made another mistake. It's hard to do all those things. But I am learning. And I hope it won't be so hard as I get older. Mom said she would talk to all my friends' parents. She did. She told them to send me home if I stopped at their house. She told them she would call first if I can stop.

Mom was so nice. I will try not to do that again. Because I don't want my mom to be scared. And I don't want her to call the police again. I am afraid of the police. They arrest people. The next evening another friend asked me to go to her house, but I said no. I told her I didn't ask my Mom. But I will ask her when I get home. Mom was very proud of me. You see. I learn better when grown-ups are reasonable with me. I learn from them. When they are reasonable, that makes me try to be reasonable too. And then we get along better. The more scared I get, the less reasonable I am.

Confused

At our family meeting, we talked about strangers. I don't know who is a stranger. Mom and Dad say it's anyone I don't know. But I ask them if the police are strangers. And they say the police are our friends. That's strange because I don't know any police.

Mom and Dad tell me not to talk to strangers. But we go to the mall to shop and people I don't know say hi to me. And Mom and Dad tell me to answer. I think about that all the time. But I still don't understand. I wonder if my aunt who lives far away is a stranger. I don't know her. I have a new friend. Mom knows her parents. But I don't. I wonder if my friend's parents are strangers.

When I am with Mom and Dad, I am not afraid. But when I am not with them, I don't know what to do. Then I get scared. I am really mixed-up about this stranger thing.

The candyman

One day, I was coming home from school. I was with my friends. A man was standing in front of the school. He had a big bag. Some of the kids knew him. But I didn't know him. He was the father of one of the kids. He gave us some candy. And the kids took it. I took some too. We walked home eating the candy. I still had a piece left when I got home. Mom asked me where I got it. I told her. And she got mad. She said I shouldn't have taken it. Mom said I should not take things from strangers. And if I get something I should not eat it. I should bring it home. And she or Dad will decide. Mom said I disobeyed. But I really didn't. Mom and Dad don't understand. They tell me a lot about strangers. And they think I understand. But I don't. I am trying to obey. But I still get in trouble.

NEXT WEEK: I don't understand.

Dr Jaslin Salmon is a professor of sociology and is also trained in counselling and psychotherapy. He is currently president/CEO of the International Institute for Social, Political and Economic Change (IISPEC) in Kingston, Jamaica (www.iispec.org). The book can be purchased at Sangster's Book Stores, Kingston Bookshop, amazon.com and Trafford.com/07-1449.